The Help

Before we arrived, everyone told us "You must hire a staff." I always demurred, saying we would neither need nor want help around the house (i.e. housekeeper, driver, gardener, cook, guard). We even requested apartment living partially to negate the need for gardeners and guards. There were several reasons for my resistance, but two main ones. First, I think most Americans are generally uncomfortable with the idea of someone serving their personal needs as an employee. It's uncommon in our culture. A strength of America is our genuine belief in equality. And it's hard to feel like equals when you pay someone to follow you around the house cleaning up your mess. Add to that my cocky Peace Corps sensibility that takes great pride in "living like the locals", and I was even more recalcitrant. Second, I didn't want to deal with the realities of hiring, interviewing, managing, paying salaries, providing benefits, perhaps firing, and generally having a stranger in my personal space.

None of those things have changed, and yet we now have a housekeeper (or "didi") and driver. Why? Because everyone was right. Mainly because everything really is just a little bit more challenging here. We actually need help. For example, just going to the grocery store is an ordeal. Ever been to a grocery store without an open parking space? That doesn't accept credit cards? And doesn't have milk in stock? All three at the same time? I have. So then you have to walk...to multiple stores...which takes more time. And after lugging your produce home, you still must sanitize the fruits and veggies because you can't eat untreated, uncooked food here unless you want to move into your bathroom. Having someone who can do anything to add to the efficiencies in an inherently inefficient land is a god send. On top of this, it's just really nice to come home to a clean house. The beds are made. The dishes, which have to be washed by hand, are clean. The constantly dusty floor is swept. The laundry is clean, folded and ironed.

Even better than those personal benefits is knowing that you have given consistent employment to someone in a very poor country. And what seems super cheap for us, at about $140 per month, is a truly decent wage here. Our didi makes only about $18 per month less than a college educated electrical engineer that I interviewed for a visa the other day. The median income in Nepal is just over $400 per year. Our staff earn that in 3 months. Before, I felt that my role in Kathmandu was not to be a job creator. That is for under-taxed millionaires in America to do. But once you meet these extremely kind, hard working individuals, it becomes a pleasure to give them work. And I know many colleagues who say their staff has become like a part of their family, especially those who help care for their children. Our staff is too new for all that, but I certainly like them as people and hope it continues to work out. After our extremely nervous driver couldn't get the truck up the steep exit from our garage on his first day, I had my doubts. But it actually endeared him to me even more. Our decision to stick with him has paid off so far. I can honestly say the couple we share him with might not even be married without his help. They got married here, in Nepal's famous bureaucracy, made even worse if you're a foreigner. Our driver, over several days, took them to numerous government offices (all unknown to them) where he translated, haggled, and guided them through a maze of forms, stamps, and bribes. What would we do without you Gopi? Keep up the good work, and thanks for your help.